the world is
yours
dear
 admirer(s) ❤
the only obstacle hindering you, is you
https://carry-on-my-wayward-butt.tumblr.com/post/133208448951 carry-on-my-wayward-butt

flirting with a man at a bar

carry-on-my-wayward-butt:

me: hey lemme see ur phone I’ll put my number in

unsuspecting fool: hahah sure *hands me his phone*

me: *transfers his entire Pokemon Go team to myself*

fool: what the fuck?

me: *rips my jacket open to reveal a sensible tee with a large bedazzled letter R* TO PROTECT THE WORLD FROM DEVISTA–

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